dream record

it starts in this house that is impossibly small and horribly arranged, im in a bathroom where i try to sit on the toilet, i have to lower my right knee to fit under the sink cabinet, and extend my left one all the way out because its so low and the shower stall is too close so it pushes on my right shoulder. 

i squeeze out of the bathroom and enter what is essentially a hotel room with two queen sized beds on opposite walls, facing each other.  my mom, my brother, and this girl teresa, who i know from pjp, are in the room, my brother and teresa are sleeping in separate beds and my mom is awake and walking towards me, trying to force feed me pills of some sort.  i somehow break away after a long struggle and get into the bed next to teresa, who says ‘gross’ and gets out and opens a cabinet that has only a budweiser inside and says ‘awesome, great’ opens it while walking and goes out the door, the camera of the dream follows in one of those swooping over the shoulder shots to reveal the outside world.  
outside is mostly grass with clumps of tall pine trees and then a large forest of pine off to the far left.  the grassland is sort of hilly and it is sunny with light fluffy clouds.  brendan and i are walking off to the right towards what appears to be one of those outdoor exercise bars and things.  he approaches one and as he does, a man and his son appear to do what we find out to be some kind of advanced athletic training.  the son basically takes over the place and i say something like ‘hey we were here first’ and then an argument ensues between myself and the father that feels too macho, pissing contest kind of thing.  very american male type a argument and it makes me uncomfortable.  just as it reaches a fever pitch, there is some strange opening of the pine tree forest to reveal two men in white standing under the arch of the trees with a dashed line that runs along the forest edge.  
they stop there and seem to be holding hands, and all of a sudden all of the cell phone towers and water towers that had been scattered throughout the landscape take off like rockets [and the man i had been arguing with says ‘i didnt know they could do that’] and then missiles fly from behind us towards the two men, and all sort of military hullabaloo goes on seemingly against them, and i think theres confetti falling from the sky.  american confetti.  we walk so that we are close to them, they are facing us, we are on their right hand side, and all of a sudden more men come from behind them and cross the line and turn back again and start playing baseball.
turns out it was the canadians who had come to the border to play baseball with us on memorial day, and we americans freaked out and tried to blow them up [they magically didnt get blown up, stupid canadians] then one of them hit the ball and it came flying right at my face and i woke up.
stupid canadians. also, the whole time i could see a spot of blood on my face out of the corner of my eye but never figured out what it was.  maybe that was another dream.
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